Confusingous

Forgetting of course that Coldplay’s song ‘Viva La Vida’ is a direct rip-off of Joe Satriani (see this), Confusingous also despises that song.

That is, of course, until Confusingous happened along this remake by the fabulous Abrams Brothers. Because Confusingous cares, and because Confusingous knows that the vomitous Coldplay version is still played every five seconds on American radio, he brings you this version:

Now, whenever the subpar Coldplay version comes on, think about this one.

And it has spoken word! Check it out here!

A parade a day keeps the street sweeper at play.

The recording appeared to be made between Boxcar, a campfire and a horse carcass so the quality is not so hot. But check it out here.

Gravity makes the world stay round.

For some reason Boxcar was singing at least an octave too high. Confusingous thinks someone slipped something into his franks and beans. But it should pass.

Anyway, check it out here.

There is no rest for the wicked except during naptime.

Nothing is funnier than a bad joke gone awry.

A few weeks back Confusingous suggested that ‘Something More’ by Sugarland was a bad song to listen on the way to work on Monday.

On second thought, ‘I Hate My Job’ by Uncle Leon and The Alibis may be way worse.

Wine is fine but whiskey is quicker. Though breaking a whiskey and wine bottle on your head is quickest.

Well, try out this bad boy:

2 Broken Hearts
Choreographed by Larry & Terri Boezeman
Description: 48 count couples dance
Music: Husbands & Wives by Brooks & Dunn

Note: Man’s steps are listed, ladies steps are mirror image.

1/4 TURN, STEP TOGETHER
1-3 Step forward 1/4 turn left on left foot, step together with right, step
together with left. (now facing 9:00)
4-6 Step back on right turning 1/4 turn left, step together with left, step
together with right (now facing back to 12:00)
7-9 Repeat steps 1-3 (now facing 3:00)
10-12 Repeat steps 4-6 (now facing back to 6:00)

BALANCE STEP, LADIES TURN
13-15 Step forward on left, step together with right, step together with
left.
16-18 Step back on right, together left, together right
19-21 MAN: Step forward on left, step together right, together left.
LADY: Step back on Right, together Left, together Right, while turning full
turn right under ladies Right hand and man’s Left hand
22-24 MAN: Step back on right, together left, together right.
LADY: Step in place left, right, left (join left hand with man’s right in
open position, double hand hold).

VINE, 1/4 TURN, ROCK STEP
25-27 Step to left side on left, step right behind left, step to left side
on left turning 1/4 turn left. (release left hand from ladies right)
28-30 Rock forward on right, recover left, step to right side on right
turning 1/4 turn right.

FREE SPIN, ROCK STEP
31-33 (release hands) with weight on right foot pivot 1/2 turn to the right
(ladies to the left) step on left, with weight on left, pivot 1/2 turn to
the right step on right with weight on right pivot 1/4 turn to the right
step on left. (rejoin man’s left hand with ladies right hand)
34-36 Rock forward on right, recover left, step back on right.

FREE SPIN, CROSS SIDE TOGETHER
37-39 (release hands) step back on left pivoting 1/2 turn to the left
(ladies to the right), step forward on right pivoting 1/2 turn to the left,
step back on left pivoting 1/4 turn to the left (rejoin in closed position)
40-42 Step right across left, step left together, step right together.

GRAPEVINE, SIDE BREAK TOGETHER
43-45 Step left across right, step to right side on right, step left behind
right.
46-48 Rock to right side on right, recover left, step right together.

REPEAT

With the country in dire straits, the president needed the advice from places he had not yet looked. Unfortunately, Dire Straits was unavailable for consultation. So, they called in the next best thing: Styx!

A high maintenance woman wants neither a maintenance man, according to Toby Keith, or a low budget man, according to Hank Williams Jr. Think about it.

Confusingous knows. We all work so hard. Running through life. It takes a major strain on body and mind. Sometimes we feel like we just need to close our eyes. But we can’t because life is going on and on and on.

Well, Confusingous has an easy solution. Stop mainlining energy drinks. Stop burning your extremities. Now get your tooth picks out of your eyes and take a look at this gem:

Now, try sleeping. Ever again.

Your Welcome,
Confusingous

I’d take a good laugh over a good punch in the face, anyday.

We all know it is rare for Confusingous to involve himself in a cause.
However, this one could not be overlooked.

Click here to sign the petition to reinstate Hank Williams Opry membership!

The Opry fired Hank on August 11, 1952 due to his drinking issues. Hank Williams died on January 1, 1953 and the issue was never able to be resolved. Since then, the Grand Ole Opry has used the music and image of Hank Williams to promote it’s show and products. The Opry owes Hank Williams and his family the courtesy of returning his membership if they choose to use his legacy for financial gain.

Please be sure to sign the petition so that The Grand Ole Opry may be told your opinion: that they should do right by Hank!

Eating yourself silly is not as funny as it sounds.